HELP with my thesis statement please?

The only problem with the "both characters are outsiders" lies in the fact that Victor created the "monster" so in effect, the monster is not an outsider but a reflection of its creator (Victor). The monster cannot be taught to be something Victor is not. So in my opinion that point is moot, and is not valid enough to stand as its own paragraph. Unless of course this is high school, and your teacher will think that point is genius. Your call. Good luck.